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English Writing Exercise (All Levels)

Course 201, Unit 8, Lesson 5

Directions to your house

Instructions: Using the vocabulary words from this lesson, provide directions for a guest from the nearest bus stop to your house. Which direction should your guest go? Where should he turn? What will he see on his way to your house? How will he recognize your house?

velvet's submission: Average Rating:
It is my senior school called the First Senior School in my town which is the only senior school in my town. It was set up in 1940s when my town was govened by Japanese. It is located in the center of my town,so its area is not big. It consists of two buildings, two football fields which is not standard, and four basketball courts. One building is older. It was built when the school was just set up. It has four floors with a triangular roof and its surface is grey. Beause it is too small and contain the students whose number is increasing all the time nowadays, another building is built. It is a while building and has six floors and spacious classroom with advanced teaching facilities. It is really a good place for study. I spent three years there studying math, Chinese, English, physics, chemistry, biology, politics, history and geography, getting ready for university entrance examination. It was really a hard and busy time for me. But it is not painful after you experienced the pain,for you have got a lot.
Submitted over a year ago

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  • Esdaile
    Mochapoints: 12971  |  Teacher Score: 9783 (0%)
    Excellent Velvet! Well written. Keep on writing as you are doing really well.
    Submitted over a year ago
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  • Saurabh
    Mochapoints: 37494  |  Teacher Score: 24865 (100%)
    (The last school I attened was) the senior school also called the ... which is the only senior school in my town. ..governed by THE Japanese. .. two football grounds that are... ...is older than the other one. ..and containS the.. another building is being built. ...place for studying (or to study) All subject names should start with capital letters. ..it is no more painful once you have experience the pain, for you have learnt a lot.. Overall good.
    Submitted over a year ago
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  • Dawn
    Mochapoints: 6647  |  Teacher Score: 1685 (100%)
    This is a good piece of writing, Velvet. Aside from the corrections Saurabh gave you, you have written a nice, long piece. Good job!
    Submitted over a year ago
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  • Donald
    Mochapoints: 10546  |  Teacher Score: 5412 (98%)
    Hi Velvet, I’m offering these corrections for American English; you’ll notice a difference from Saurabh’s Indian/British English forms. I haven’t used this word, but, for example, “learnt” in India = “learned” in America. My senior school (high school in America) is called the First Senior School. (you could write something like: “Despite its name,” at the start of the next sentence, in order to point out the assumption of a second, or more schools, or simply, ) It is the only senior school in town. It was set up (established) in the 1940s when my town was governed by the Japanese. It is located in the center of town, so it is not a big school. It consists of two buildings, two football (soccer, in America) fields, (which is not standard) [“unusual” might be a better choice. Use parentheses here, because this clause is not part of the list that is being separated by all of the commas], and four basketball courts. One building is older. It was built when the school was just (originally) set up. It has four floors with a triangular roof and its surface is grey. (It is a grey, triangular shaped building with four floors (stories).) ... continued below...
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  • Donald
    Mochapoints: 10546  |  Teacher Score: 5412 (98%)
    ... continued from above... Because it is too small to contain (hold / serve) the students whose numbers are increasing all the time nowadays, another building is being built (“Building is being built” doesn’t feel / sound right; try “one is being built” or “building is under construction” or “building is being added”). It is a while (white?) building with six floors, spacious classrooms, and advanced teaching facilities. It is (“will be” if the building is not in use yet) a really good place to study. I spent three years at this school studying Math, Chinese, English, Physics, Chemistry, Biology, Political Science, History, [it’s the writer’s choice whether to use a comma here; I prefer to do so] and Geography, getting ready for (the /my) university entrance examination(s). It was really a hard (the proper word is “difficult”, but most people do use “hard”) and busy time for me. It was a painful time, but the pain is soon forgotten, and what remains is valuable experience. [This last sentence can be written numerous ways, depending on the writer’s style and outlook.] This work is good, especially your effort to write a detailed and thoughtful passage. It seems that you study now will be on grammatical details, vocabulary, and idioms. Keep it up :-), Donald
    Submitted over a year ago
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  • Jack Lee
    Mochapoints: 66499  |  Teacher Score: 54807 (99%)
    Velvet, That is exceptional - The language and the discription are very well done, Jack
    Submitted over a year ago
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  • mbkent
    Mochapoints: 14975  |  Teacher Score: 11346 (0%)
    Velvet - great writing as usual, and very interesting insight into your life, for all of us to enjoy! I have nothing else to offer beyond what Donald has already commented! Great writing!
    Submitted over a year ago
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