My occupation
Instructions:
Using the vocabulary from this lesson, please describe your occupation. What do you do? Do you like what you do? How long have you been working in this field? Did you always want to be in this occupation?
Ok! But I don't know exactly what's holydays concept. I like to travel more than staying in a place taking the sun on the beach. So, when I travel, I work for a part and I visit the city in the same time. If I could earn more money, I'd like to go to Brazil or in other continent, in Iran. I don't like any propaganda in our western countries leaded by oil industry so, I like to go in the place to see by myself and take a direct feeling of the living mood. Japan must be amazing too, so far from Europa and its culture. Always a learning to compare our way of life in this little boat, our planet!
Salaam!
Submitted over a year ago
English Writing Exercise 
Ok! But I don't know exactly what's holidays concept.
Very Good!
OK! But I don't know exactly what is the concept of a holiday. I like to travel more so than just staying in one place getting a tan at the beach. So, when I travel, I work some of the time and get to visit the city as well. If I could earn more money I'd like to go to Brazil or any other continent, in Iran. I don't like any propaganda in our western countries leaded by oil industry so, next sentence I am not sure what you mean?? Japan must be amazing too, so far from Europa and its culture. Always learning to compare our ways of life in this little boat, our planet! Salaam!
Ok, but I don't exactly know the concept of a holiday. (This use of "holiday" is referring to a national holiday, such as Christmas or New Year's Day. British english uses the word "holiday" to mean "vacation" or "trip.")
I like to travel more than staying in one place and taking in the sun on the beach. So, when I travel, I work for a part part of the time, and I visit the city in the same time. (Not sure what you mean here, do you mean that you work while visiting the city? "I work part-time while visiting the city." or "I work and visit the city at the same time." Or did you mean that you work some of the time, then visit the city the rest of the time? "I work for part of the time, then visit the city." or "I work a bit, then visit the city with the rest of my time.")
If I could earn more money, I'd like to go to Brazil or, in other in another continent, Iran. I don't like the propaganda in our western countries which is lead by the oil industry, so I would like to go in the place to see by myself there myself to get a feel for and see the country. ("take a direct feeling of the living mood" would not be said, and is unclear. One would more likely say something like "see first-hand the culture", "get a feel for the country" or "experience everyday life directly.")
Japan must be amazing too, being so far from Europa and its culture. (Good job! Many people are confused between "it's" and "its". Even native speakers! But this is correct.) It's always a learning experience to compare ways of life in this little boat, our planet!
Good job, keep working at it! Most of the changes are just because the sentences are unclear or awkward in english.
very good butthere is is some suggeion that may help
Ok! But I don't know exactly what's a holyday concept. I like to travel more than staying in one place taking the sun on the beach. So, when I travel, I work part of the day and I visit the city at the same time. If I could earn more money, I'd like to go to Brazil or any other country Iran for example. I don't like the propaganda in our western countries leaded by oil industry so, I like to go to a place to see by myself and take a direct feeling of the living mood. Japan must be amazing too, so far from Europa and its culture. I Always learn and use the new technology where the compare is our way of life in this little boat, our planet! Salaam!
excellent victor
Ok! But I don't know exactly what the concept of a holiday is. I like travelling more than staying in one place sunbathing on the beach. So, when I travel, I work for a while (or I spend part of the time working) and I visit the city at the same time. If I could earn more money, I'd like to go to Brazil or, in another continent, Iran. I don't like any propaganda in our western countries led by oil industry so, I like to go to the place to see for myself and get a direct feeling for the living mood (ambience? personality of the country?). Japan must be amazing too, so far from Europe and its culture. It is always a learning experience to compare our ways of life in this little boat, our planet! Salaam!
Hello, Victor. I enjoyed reading your thoughts on this subject, and I thought you might be interested in one more alternative idea for consideration in your writing revision process.
Ok! But I don't know exactly what is meant by this particular holiday concept. I like to travel more than staying in one place sun bathing on the beach. So, when I travel, I work part of the time and I visit the city, too. If I could earn more money, I'd like to go to Brazil or to another continent, perhaps Iran. I don't like any propaganda in our western countries led by the oil industry, so I would like to go to the location to see it and experience a direct feeling of the prevailing mood and how the people live their lives. Japan must be amazing, too, being so far from Europe and its culture. I'm always learning by comparing one way of life with another in this little boat: our planet! Salaam!
Good
Good.
Ok! But I don't exactly know what is the conceptual meaning of 'holydays'. (see Toby826 and CanDo for best reviews on this sentence.)
I like (I prefer) to travel more than I do staying in one place while taking in the sun. (Victor I am trying to work with your thinking style. Taking in the sun is a common english expression although it makes no sense in english grammar per sé.)
So, w When I travel, I work for a part and I visit the citiesy in at the same time. If I could After I earn more money, I'd (I'de) I would like to go to Brazil or in to another continent, in like Iran. I don't like any the propaganda in our western countries that are leded by the oil industries.y so, I like to go in visit the place and see by for myself, and by tak e directly experiencing a direct feeling of the living mood of the people who live there. Japan must be an amazing place too, it is so far from European and its culture. It is (It's) A always a learning experience, to compare our ways of life in this little boat, our planet .
optional: It is an ongoing learning experience to compare our ways of life in this little boat, our planet, the earth. Aleikum a salaam!