English Writing Exercise

Course 101, Unit 2, Lesson 4

Describing Hairstyles

Using both positive and negative characteristics, describe the hairstyles of six people: a woman, a man, a girl, a boy, you and me. EX. The young girl does not have short hair. She has long hair.


Elena's submission: Average Rating:
The young woman has long black hair, she does not have a grey beard. The old man has short white hair and a grey mustache, he does not have long blue hair. My friend has long light brown curly hair.
I do not have long brown hair. A lot of men have no hair, they are bald. What color is your hair?
Submitted over a year ago



Reviews

  • Nuno Santos
    Mochapoints: 4296  |  Teacher Score: 2485 (0%)
    Отличн !
    Submitted over a year ago
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  • Lethal Princess
    Mochapoints: 15670  |  Teacher Score: 4860 (0%)
    Perfect!
    Submitted over a year ago
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  • cuppachino ɐddn...
    Mochapoints: 15192  |  Teacher Score: 8602 (100%)
    The following 2 are classic "run on" sentences. i.e. 2 independent clauses joined with no conjunction, or spliced with a comma. The old man has short white hair and a grey mustache, he does not have long blue hair. A lot of men have no hair, they are bald. Solution options: 1. split into 2 independent sentences 2. use a semicolon instead of comma 3. use "and" / "but" to link the 2 clauses 4. use a semicolon, followed by "therefore" or "in fact" 5. use a colon (if the second clause clarifies the first) It's a minor form of grammatical error. The rest is all perfect, and particularly tidy.
    Submitted over a year ago
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  • cuppachino ɐddn...
    Mochapoints: 15192  |  Teacher Score: 8602 (100%)
    "My friend has long light brown curly hair." The customary word order for HAIR with a series of attributes: ► condition ► length ► waviness ► color Therefore, it should be rewritten as: My friend has long curly light brown hair. Other examples: fizzy dry long curly blonde hair oily shoulder-length wavy brown hair healthy shiny waist-length jet black hair
    Submitted over a year ago
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  • Elena
    Mochapoints: 5327  |  Teacher Score: 2258 (0%)
    Thanks!
    Submitted over a year ago
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