Review Member Submissions - Writing

Professions

Describe the professions of four people: a woman, a man, you and me. Use both positive and negative sentences. Ex. I am a student. The man is a doctor; he is not a teacher.

Author:

shyamak
I have an exquisite piece of furniture and it is my desk. It is made of precious teek wood. A typical piece of archiac design it is. My grandpa got it built by fine artisans of the time. It's not a mere piece of funiture for me but a place where I feel the warmth of love from my forefathers. At the same time it adjusts everything I need as a good wife does. Really I am too possesive about it. It's top is covered with spotless white glass. My desk reflects my sweet memories with my family and pals as I put my favourite photos and paper-cuttings beneath the glass. Thus it's table cum album. Isn't it amazing? It's drawers are made with great planning that they can engulf anything in the world. And you know It has some small screat hide-outs for valuables and confidential material. And you can imagine what I put over there. Ofcourse my girlfriend's letters and photos, quite safe and away from the spying eyes of my younger brother. Sometimes I wonder how I would have been managing if my grandpa hadn't made it
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Submitted: 2008-05-01 08:50:30



Reviews

  • 2008-05-02 00:48:30
    Chynna
    I have an exquisite piece of furniture and it is my desk. It is made of precious teak wood. A typical piece of archaic design it is. My grandpa got it built by fine artisans of the time. It's not a mere piece of furniture for me but a place where I feel the warmth of love from my forefathers. At the same time it adjusts everything I need as a good wife does. Really I am too possessive about it.
    Its top is covered with spotless white glass. My desk reflects my sweet memories with my family and pals as I put my favorite photos and paper-cuttings beneath the glass. Thus it's a table cum album. Isn't it amazing?
    Its drawers are made with great planning that they can engulf anything in the world. You know it has some small secret hide-outs for valuables and confidential material. You can imagine what I put over there. Of course my girlfriend's letters and photos,  quite safe and away from the spying eyes of my younger brother. Sometimes I wonder how I would have been managing if my grandpa hadn't made it
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  • 2008-05-02 19:53:00
    Chynna
    Very wonderful! You are able to meet practical writing needs and develop your idea very well in simple descriptions. You connect sentences well in the paragraph using basic cohesive elements. The vocabulary, grammar, and style are concise and clear. I have a few changes for you in the separate version. Thank you very much for the great submission. Please keep it up. Best wishes to you
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  • 2008-05-05 09:53:28
    shyamak
    Thanks very much for valuable suggestions, love and admiration.
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